My Dear Brother Eran
My dear brother Eran,
Throughout your life and now in your death, you presented me with challenges.
Throughout your life and now in your death, you demanded from me maturity. You demanded from me unconditional love; you demanded from me unlimited sensitivity.
I will never know from where I drew the strength during those difficult moments of parting from you.
My precious Erani,
How proud I was of you – of every small step you took, of every new thing you learned, of your special way of letting us know your feelings and of your small tricks.
How happy I was every time you smiled, laughed, hugged, ran in carefree abandon and waved your hands in joy.
The look in your eyes always taught me what you were feeling. Sometimes it was a look of joy, other times a look of sadness, and always lots of looks of understanding and attentiveness.
So many memories have come back to me this week of experiences we shared, so many moments of joy and laughter.
I wake up at 2:00 in the morning to feed Uri and I cry. I cry because you are missing, I cry because you are my little brother. My whole life I was worried who would care for you after my death. Who would nurture you, love you, kiss you and hug you, my little brother. But in the end it is you who have left me here alone.
What else is there to say when there are no words, when the tears choke the throat?
There remains but to thank you – for making me what I am today, for leading me in your own way to find my place and purpose. You taught me so much, without saying a word.
There remains but to ask you forgiveness for not having been at your side during the last half a year of your life, and to hope that you understand and forgive me.
My dear brother, my only brother,
Throughout your life and now in your death, you stood in front of me challenges. I can only hope that I did not disappoint you and that I withstood them all.
Your loving sister,
More from Hidden: